Heeeey--it's Turkey Day! Thanks, spanks, and Little Jon Cranks.

Hey Hey Hey! Happy Thanksgiving everyone! There is so much in this world to be thankful for and to celebrate with your family. While I admit, there is always the question- is the grass greener on the other side? I am a firm believer that the grass is greener where you water/fertilize it.

            I did the whole 30 day of thankfulness on Facebook, and to be honest, I wish I never started. I lost track of where I was some days, I didn't get onto FB everyday to post- just stalk and lurk- and I didn't keep up with my posts. So today I just made a generic thankful post. For my blog though, I'm serving the whole turkey dinner of thankfulness, equipped with sides and all, cause you know I am a formerwhoiamikiddingstillam fatty, still aiming to achieve the "goal weight".

Today, I am thankful for my son Xavier. He is the best thing that has ever happened to me. He loves me no matter what, and to see things through his eyes, has been enlightening! Today, I am thankful for my husband. While he drives me absolutely insane some days, most days he is absolutely sexy, amazing. We've been through a lot during our 7 years together, he's stayed by my side through some of the toughest times in my life, and vice versa. I'm so happy that I asked to touch his head (the one on the top of his body) the night I met him on Mars, the bar.

Today, I am thankful for my extended family and friends. I am truly blessed. The only complaint is that I do not get to see my girls enough. Most of us are married, mothers, work full time jobs, and all that adult stuff. I am thankful that I have a job, my husband has a job, and that we can afford the things we need, and want. I am thankful that I have great health coverage, and I'm thankful that I have God my by side through it all!

But to the real point of my blog... I am thankful that I am healthy, and at the point where I am at today. You see, I grew up in a house always filled with Carbs and Sugar. My father was the Tasty Cake and Twinkie KING... we never left the grocery store without Oreos, Poptarts, Ho-hos, cookies... or all of the above. Then, there was my mother- the sugar shack queen with a side of jelly beans. She knew every candy store within a 50 miles radius. Dinners were mainly spaghetti, Hamburger Helper, Pizza, meatloaf, stroganoff, breaded chicken, breaded pork chops, breaded bread, breaded butter, bread bread bread bread bread.. oh and  bread..  Needless to say, my brother and I were chubsters.

  I have been overweight for as long as I can remember. It never bothered me that much until I got my heart ripped out, smeared through manure, and thrown through the leave chopper by a guy. I made him my world, and he used me, that story is saved for a Ricki Lake show, or maybe I'll sell it to Maury, he loves the drama.Once that break up happened, I finally took a look at myself and wanted to do something about the blubber I was unnecessarily holding onto as I wasn't swimming the English Channel. I tipped the scales at 218, when I finally thought enough was enough.... here's one of the few photos I could find at that weight.

 I began a love affair with working out, cut out all junk, and dropped 20lbs pretty quickly. That following fall, I moved to Pittsburgh for a new journey, and still worked out as much as I could, but still had a makeout session with bagels and peanut butter and chocolate and beer and anything that was buffalo hot sauce flavored. I was a food whore. Quite a bit. And I wasn't getting paid.

Eventually I had enough and really put balls to the walls and got my shit together. I knew something had to change, and that something was me. I worked hard over the next 2 years, and dropped another 51 lbs. I got to my lowest weight ever ever in my teens and adult life. I can't even remember how old I was the last time I weighed in the 140s. But at 23 years old, I weighed 147 lbs, and I was damn proud. A few pics of me at that weight, on the night that I met my husband- June 18, 2005 

I worked out twice a day... 1.25 hours of cardio and 45 minutes of weight. My diet was 1500 calories, and I  didn't always stay true to it. I loved the number, but I wanted it lower. I wanted to be thinner and there were other trouble spots I had to take care of!!  However, after meeting my husband, I became comfortable, and I dropped the two-a-day workouts, and I stopped calorie counting. I was happy. But there was also that inner critic of mine that kept telling me I was too fat. Over the past 7 years, I have gained back about 13lbs, and that is even after having a baby. I"m still trying to lose those last 12lbs but I'd be happy to lose 5, or 8, or 13. You know.. make the number lower. 

The best part is, that I hit a milestone today. I ran a turkey trot 5k, and I hit a new record. (first, I didn't feel like I was going to crap myself while I was running, and second, I ran my fastest time ever). I finished 3.11 miles in 27:36. My BEST ORGANIZED 5K TIME EVER!!! I was stoked, yet I was disappointed. I wanted under 27 minutes, and I almost had it. Seriously, there are 3 things that affected me not getting my goal. 1- My ear buds kept falling off, and my arm band popped off twice. 2- I ran into someone's snot rocket. Yep, actually 2 people's snot rocket. They totally shot their boogers out of their nose. One landed right on my leg, the other on my arm. Skeeved me out. Like for real, I had to slow down because I felt like I was going to vomit. and 3rd- this man cut me off and started to walk, while I was working my my mojo on a .25 mile hill, so I got set back, AGAIN. My first mile =8:13, second mile 8:33, and third mile 9:49. But I did it.. faster than ever, so I am proud. I also ran back and met up with  my friend and did another .90 miles with her. So all in all it was a good run.

Currently- here's what I look like: As of this morning, I weigh 160.8...  not happy, but I also know that I haven't been calorie counting, or working out as much as I should  be. I also know that I don't want to be stressing over losing weight when my hubby and I are currently humping like rabbits, or trying to conceive, our second little Baby Bear Wilson. So.. at this point, my head isn't in the weight loss game, but I'll keep running my 12-20 miles a week, and eat as mindfully as I can, with the occasional chocolate peanut butter covered treat. Sugar, schmugar.